


The One Where Soda Is Discovered

by madnessiseverything



Series: the wonderous antics of two demon housemates [1]
Category: Video Blogging RPF, jacksepticeye, markiplier - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, and shit happens, anti looooooves soda, basically dark and anti are stuck in a house together, dark is just trying to figure shit out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-07
Updated: 2017-04-07
Packaged: 2018-10-16 03:28:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10562757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madnessiseverything/pseuds/madnessiseverything
Summary: Anti gasped.“Look at this one!”Dark put down his sandwich and pulled a face at the bottle Anti was now holding up.“It’s… green.”





	

**Author's Note:**

> hello and welcome to this series of roommate dark and anti. i introduce to you, part one, where anti discovers soda and dark hates everything.

Two damned days. 

They had been stuck in this prison of a house - or mansion, considering the admirable size of the place - for two days and Dark still had no clue what was holding them here or why it felt so incredibly familiar. It was driving him crazy. 

Dark liked his surroundings to be under his own control, to have everything exactly the way he wanted it. Waking up in a house he couldn’t properly leave, with no knowledge of how he got here or who was behind it, was becoming to be quite high on his list of what he disliked. 

Even the few feet he had managed to walk towards the metal gate closing off the property had been filled with a tension that seemed to find its way to his mind and made the hard fought control he had over his stumbling human vessel shake. 

It was too familiar, and yet Dark couldn’t pinpoint what it was or how he knew it. It drove him wild, much like the circumstances of his imprisonment. 

A loud bang sounded through the house and Dark sighed loudly. Speaking of that list of things he disliked. He looked up from the sandwich he had just managed to slap together for himself to find the other being trapped in here with him stumbling into the kitchen.

“Food,” Anti groaned. “Why?” 

Dark rolled his eyes and picked up the sandwich. The need for nourishment was something he was reluctant to get used to, too. “Because humans are weak.” 

Anti looked at the sandwich in Dark’s hands. Dark narrowed his eyes and bit into it, nodding towards the fridge. He refused to let the younger demon near him, especially not when he was in possession of what the other desired. The massive amounts of impulsivity Anti had displayed throughout the two days of their joined hell were enough to make Dark suspicious. Sadly, it also made him a variable Dark had found hard to control. 

Not to say that he gave up on finding the things that made Anti tick, on finding ways of disabling said variable. He simply had been set back a few steps in his plan to at least gain a touch of control over the situation. He was working on it.

He watched as Anti turned to the fridge and threw it open, hands shaking where they hovered in the air. Dark noted the tremble down on his mental list of things regarding Anti. Any information was welcome.

“What is this shit?”

Dark carefully chewed and raised his eyebrows at Anti, who was holding up a bottle filled with dark orange liquid. 

“Multivitamin juice” Dark deadpanned, reading the label. 

Anti narrowed his eyes at him, unscrewed the bottle and took a sip. His face scrunched up and he shuddered. “Humans are fucking disgusting.”

Dark couldn’t help but agree, not that he would ever let Anti know. 

Anti tossed the bottle aside and it rolled across the floor into a corner, the juice leaking onto the tiles. He leaned down into the fridge again and Dark continued eating his sandwich, each bite making him more annoyed that human vessels needed regular nutrition. 

This was taking precious time away from his research. The other demon was making it impossible to focus on the opened laptop, an incredibly convenient item Dark had found the day before, sitting in front of him. With Anti jumping around, Dark had to make sure to carefully watch his mannerisms. He had a variable to solve, after all. Anti gasped. 

“Look at this one!” 

Dark put down his sandwich and pulled a face at the bottle Anti was now holding up. 

“It’s… green.” Bright green at that. Comparing it to the human food Dark had witnessed in the past this looked to be positively artificial.

“I know!” Anti excitedly opened the drink that read ‘Mountain Dew’ on its label and took a big gulp. Dark waited for the disgusted reaction Anti had displayed a few minutes ago. 

Anti swallowed and stared at the bottle. “Fuck.” 

Dark tilted his head as Anti started giggling. He really, really hated that sound, having heard that giggle too many times for his liking already.

“This is amazing!” Anti tipped his head back and started chugging the disgustingly green liquid. 

Dark watched in disbelief as the other emptied the bottle before dropping it, the now empty plastic slowly rolling away.

“What the fuck?”

Anti looked at him as if he had discovered a way out of their prison his eyes wide and mouth agape. “Humans are vile, but that,” Anti pointed at the bottle that was steadily getting further away, “is a masterpiece.”

Dark didn’t need to taste the vile green substance to strongly disagree.

The fridge started beeping and Anti narrowed his eyes. “Shut up!” He grabbed another bottle and slammed the door shut, cutting the beeping sound off abruptly. He held the drink up, the liquid clear this time. “Sprite.” 

Dark scoffed. “Why would they call a drink that?” 

“Let’s find out,” Anti shrugged as he almost ripped the top off. 

Dark highly doubted the drink had any similarities to the small, annoying fae folk, just as he was growing to further doubt the other demon’s judgement. He watched as Anti tried yet another human drink. The younger demon’s face lit up and Dark sighed. 

“Even dumb organisms can create perfection, it seems,” Anti said between gulps. 

Dark disagreed. He raised the sandwich back to his mouth, noticing the way Anti’s entire form seemed to vibrate, his left arm twitching by his side. Dark frowned, taking a big bite. He couldn’t tell if the movement coming from the erratic demon was getting better or worse. 

Then Anti’s head tilted abruptly, the nearly empty bottle almost slipping from his grasp. His body shuddered and Dark saw the flash of black in his eyes. He took another bite of his sandwich and glared pointedly at Anti. 

The other ignored him and bounced on his feet. “I like this!” He turned away from Dark, head twitching from side to side as he aimed the bottle for the bin by the door. “Look,” he exclaimed and threw the bottle. Dark watched as it bounced off the door frame. 

“That was impressively awful.” 

Anti turned back around and waved his arms at Dark. “Shut up, you-” Anti stopped mid-sentence. His eyes widened ever so slightly and he started bouncing. “Food!” 

Dark rolled his eyes and finished off his sandwich. “Yes, food. Necessary to keep that scrawny vessel of yours running.” 

“Scrawny! Hah!” Anti started giggling. “Right? I tell him that all the time!” He swung around to the fridge and pulled it open, the door slamming into the counter next to it. “But there’s muscles too,” Anti yelled as he shoved his head into the fridge, left arm waving around. Dark tilted his head, brows furrowed as he listened to Anti’s ramblings. 

“Yeah, he can lift some shit. I ripped off a head with his hands, like uh…” Anti’s head popped up behind the door, confusion showing on his face, “how long have we been here?” 

“Two days,” Dark answered slowly. Anti perked up. 

“Right, two days.” He blindly reached into the fridge and pulled out what Dark recognized as ham. “So uh, I ripped that guy’s head off maybe a week ago? Incredibly satisfying, you know. Have you tried it?” 

Dark watched with disgust as Anti started stuffing his mouth with ham. “Not in centuries,” was the answer he decided to grant. “Too messy for my liking.” 

“Messy is good,” Anti mumbled through a mouthful of ham, the word barely understandable beyond single letters. 

Dark pulled the laptop closer to himself and tapped the mousepad to let the screen light up again. “Messy won’t get us out of this place,” he said coldly and Anti groaned, ham hanging from his mouth. 

“Fucking hellhole,” Anti spat and kicked the counter. 

“I would be trying to find some information, unlike you,” Dark made sure to highlight Anti’s unhelpfulness, “but the amount of noise you’re making is making it very hard.” 

Anti continued chewing, rocking back and forth on his feet as he took a few steps towards Dark. “You’re boring,” he answered and hopped onto the counter, a packet of chocolate pudding suddenly in his hands. 

“At least I’m doing something useful,” Dark hissed, his nerves stretched incredibly thin by Anti’s apparent lack of care towards their situation. 

“I’m eating,” Anti replied unhelpfully and opened the pudding before craning his head back and pouring the pudding into his mouth directly. 

Dark focused his attention back onto the laptop screen, knowing he would do something he’d regret if he paid any more mind to the actions of the incredibly annoying demon he was stuck with. 

Anti’s ability to make Dark lose his cool was making Dark itch. This wasn’t good. 

Underestimating the younger demon had been shown to be a grave mistake already, and Dark knew he was dangerous despite his childish antics. He refused to pour fuel onto the flame and if ignoring Anti would make things easier, that was exactly what Dark would do. 

\---

Dark was incredibly close to ripping Anti’s throat out. The annoying bastard was currently hanging onto the top of the door frame, swinging his legs back and forth and laughing, the high-pitched sound grating against every nerve Dark possessed. 

“What the fuck are you doing?” Dark asked through his teeth, knowing that he most likely wouldn’t get a coherent answer out of the other demon.

“Living life,” came the screeching reply and Anti slammed his feet against the door, an audible crack going through the room.

Dark took a deep breath and looked back down onto the laptop in front of him, the research on spells that could be tying them to this property just as fruitless as before. Anti clearly couldn’t handle the massive amounts of sugar he had ingested through those disgusting drinks he had emptied only 20 minutes ago. Dark could smell it. 

Anti started laughing again, even louder than before and a loud slam made Dark growl. 

The green haired demon was now clinging to the kitchen door and kicking the wall to make the door swing. 

Dark felt his mask crack. He exhaled. “Are you a fucking child?” 

“I’m bored!” Anti yelled and cackled as the door swung against the wall. Dark hoped the motion would slam down hard enough on those fragile human hands to break them into tiny pieces. 

Dark straightened his shoulders, smoothing down the loose tie around his neck. “Then go be bored elsewhere,” he said calmly. The less Anti knew about Dark the better, especially about how his actions made control seem to slip further away from Dark.

Anti dropped from the door and swayed on the spot, the air seeming to blur around his frame as he giggled. “I’m gonna swing on the chandelier!” He sung his words, voice rising by several octaves. Dark felt the need to pull out that gun he had found in one of the many rooms of the house and put several bullets into Anti’s skull. 

If only he didn’t have the feeling that Anti was connected to their imprisonment, his very presence proof of that.

Anti snorted. “It’s a song!”, he exclaimed and pointed at Dark before his very being seemed to crumble apart. Dark narrowed his eyes. 

Anti was nowhere to be seen. Only a loud crash and the following laughter pointed to his presence elsewhere in the house. 

Dark mentally marked the incident down and added teleportation to his Anti list, right below the obvious lack of sugar tolerance. The list was still too short for his liking. Dark really needed to do something about the unpredictability of his housemate. It didn’t sit well with him that Anti had managed to be an enigma Dark couldn’t immediately unravel and control.

Anti started belting a song Dark was sure he had heard while still letting Mark pilot this body. Loud sounds accompanied the horrendous singing, the clanging echoing thanks to the high ceilings of this place. Dark did not for one second doubt that Anti was indeed climbing the chandelier in the foyer. He cracked his neck and looked back down to the dim screen in front of him. 

He needed to find a way out.

**Author's Note:**

> you're welcome to drop by on my [tumblr](http://thatsmolgreenbean.tumblr.com/) and tell me how beautifully unfunny this is. :D


End file.
